If I am Not the Problem



“Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t.” “• Steve Maraboli


Two hands are pointing to each other with one hand holding a finger.Imagine for a moment what it feels like to accept with certainty that when we’re upset at anything: a person, place or thing, it is because of our reaction to it. Feels pretty yucky doesn’t it. Feels like we’re trapped, having to take the rap for everything. That’s because if I am not the problem there is no solution.

Unfortunately, in this case, it is the truth.

I remember what it felt like too, the first time I heard it. I didn’t get it! I had to ask the person to say it again slowly, so I could write it down; dissect it in pure disbelief. Since I was at the place where I couldn’t conceive of anything being my fault, let alone having to take all of the responsibility, wanted to run. Slam the door. Scream and shout who’s insane idea was this! Instead I stayed and for what may have been the first time in my life, began to listen with an open mind.

Each of us is responsible for the solution. But here is the twist.
We can’t have a solution if we are not the problem.

We are the only thing we can take credit for changing. This means we have no power whatsoever over what others say or don’t say; how they feel, or don’t feel about a certain-some thing.

Today, this is a measure of my credibility. It reminds me, if only subliminally, to look at myself first: my intentions, my motives and my best thinking. If I am not the problem, I can’t fix it. It keeps things pretty straight-forward and simple.

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